BEFORE STARTING

How to Choose the Right Alcohol Support

A comprehensive guide to your options in the UK.

What are the options?

Navigating the alcohol services across the UK can feel difficult as there are just so many different systems and pathways which can vary depending on where you live.

Many people ask 'Who do I call? My GP? NHS? Charities? Mental Health Services? Groups like AA? How do I find the best option/options for me?'

Find what works for you

Like most things in life, there is not one single solution for everyone. Alcohol dependence is a complex interplay of biology, psychology, social and environmental conditioning alongside habit.

It's a personal journey and what helps one person may not suit another, and that's OK. That does not mean one service is 'better' or 'worse' than another; the best option for someone is one that works for them.

Research consistently shows that the strength of the match between an individual and their treatment is one of the strongest predictors of success.

A programme that allows you to feel connected, fits your circumstances and addresses your concerns and goals is far more likely to lead to lasting change than one chosen under pressure or without enough information.

So take your time, keep an open mind and look at a variety of options to see what seems like the best fit.
Safety first: If you currently drink daily, or have experienced shakes, sweats, seizures, hallucinations, or confusion when you've tried to cut down, please do not stop or reduce suddenly without medical guidance. Alcohol withdrawal can be medically serious. Speak to your GP or call 111 for urgent advice. In an emergency, call 999.

The web of support

This is a general overview of the main categories of alcohol support you may encounter:
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Conventional Services

The local Drug & Alcohol service in your area, provided by the Local Authority (e.g. the Council) but which may have some crossover with the NHS.

Everyone in the UK has a right to access free-at-the-point-of-care support through these services.

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Mental Health Services

Your local IAPT service offers free NHS talking therapies for common issues such as anxiety and depression. Alcohol use and depression/anxiety often co-exist — but many specialists advise treating the alcohol issue first.

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Charities

There are a number of national and local charities that provide support.

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Recovery Community

Usually local hubs or collections of organisations that support people directly in their community.

Also called Lived Experience Recovery Organisations — run by people who have been through addiction and use their recovery experience to help others.

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Peer-Support Groups

Made up of people who have lived experience, including SMART Recovery and 12-step groups like AA.

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Private Services

Many private options, including private counsellors, coaching services, detox services and inpatient rehabs.

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Apps

A variety of self-help and motivational apps that can support people dealing with particular issues, mental health or behavioural change.

What to look for in any provider

Whether you're considering NHS services, a private programme, or a combination of different types of support, these four criteria apply across the board:
01

Registered and regulated in the provider's own name

Any service offering medical detox or clinical treatment in the UK must be registered if it carries out regulated services:
For England, verify at cqc.org.uk/care-services. Be cautious of providers that claim clinical oversight through a third-party arrangement rather than being directly regulated themselves.
02

Structured aftercare following detox

Detox addresses the physical dependence on alcohol. Without structured clinical support afterwards, relapse rates are high.

NICE clinical guideline CG115 recommends that detox should always be followed by ongoing psychosocial intervention. A credible provider will include aftercare as a core part of the programme, not as an optional add-on.
03

Independently verified outcomes

It is reasonable to ask any provider for their outcome data. Results that have been evaluated by a reputable academic or research organisation carry more weight than self-reported marketing claims.
04

A personalised clinical approach

Be wary of rigid, one-size-fits-all protocols. The best providers conduct a thorough assessment before recommending a treatment plan — including a review of your circumstances, drinking history, physical and mental health, home and social environment, and your goals.

Your wider options in the UK

Clean Slate is one option among several and the right choice depends on your personal circumstances. Below is an overview of what else is available.

Your GP

Your GP is your advocate for navigating the healthcare service. They are a great resource for continuity of care and liaising between any specialist teams caring for you. If you have general concerns about your mental health then they can be a good resource too.

As Drug & Alcohol Support is usually provided by the Local Authority (council) rather than the NHS, your GP often just signposts you to contact the services directly (they don't usually need to refer you and you can contact them directly).

Your GP cannot usually prescribe specialist medications to help with alcohol dependence. If speaking to your usual GP feels uncomfortable, you can request a different doctor at the same practice or book a telephone appointment.

NHS / Local Authority community alcohol services

Every area in England has NHS-commissioned drug and alcohol services and most accept self-referrals. These typically offer assessment, key work sessions, group therapy and, in some cases, medically supervised detox.

You can find your nearest service using the NHS alcohol support service finder (nhs.uk/service-search) or by searching via FRANK at talktofrank.com.

These services are free and confidential. The trade-off is that waiting times and treatment intensity vary by area, and the level of ongoing support may be less structured than a private programme.

Private residential rehabilitation

Residential rehab provides an immersive, structured environment away from daily life. Stays typically range from 28 days upwards and costs vary significantly from around £6,000 for a four-week programme to considerably more for specialist or luxury facilities.

Before committing, check CQC registration, ask about aftercare provision and review their most recent CQC inspection report at cqc.org.uk/care-services.

Residential treatment can be the right choice for people who need a period of complete separation from their environment, or whose home circumstances are not safe for a home-based approach. It is generally not necessary for everyone and the evidence on long-term outcomes is mixed unless robust aftercare is included.

Peer support groups

Peer support provides something clinical treatment often cannot: the experience of being genuinely understood by someone who has been where you are.

12-Step / 'Fellowship' Meetings (e.g. Alcoholics Anonymous)

Meetings across the UK, in person and online. The helpline number is 0800 917 7650. More at alcoholics-anonymous.org.uk.

SMART Recovery UK

Evidence-based mutual aid using cognitive behavioural tools. Meetings available online and locally. More at smartrecovery.org.uk.

Both are free, require no referral and you can attend to listen before deciding.

Counselling, therapy and recovery coaching

One-to-one support

Valuable at any stage. The BACP therapist directory at bacp.co.uk/search/Therapists lets you search for accredited counsellors by specialism, including alcohol and addiction.

Trauma-informed

Such as EMDR or trauma-focused CBT can be particularly relevant for people whose drinking is connected to past experiences.

Recovery coaching

This is a distinct discipline from clinical therapy. Coaches work alongside you to build practical, social, and personal resources that sustain long-term change.


J2 ARMS

Our partner, J2 ARMS, offers personalised recovery coaching pathways designed to support individuals before, during, and after clinical treatment. More at j2arms.com.

Helplines and information services

If you're not ready to commit to a programme but want to talk through your situation, these services are free and confidential:

Drinkline

0300 123 1110. Free national alcohol helpline. Weekdays 9am–8pm, weekends 11am–4pm.

Drinkaware

Independent information, self-assessment tools, and a service finder at drinkaware.co.uk.

Alcohol Change UK

Guides, research, and tools including the Try Dry app. More at alcoholchange.org.uk.

With You

Free drug and alcohol support across England and Scotland at wearewithyou.org.uk.

For people in Scotland, Wales, and Northern Ireland

Scotland

Contact your local Alcohol and Drug Partnership, or call Drinkline Scotland on 0800 731 4314.

Wales

DAN 24/7 is a free, bilingual helpline available 24 hours on 0808 808 2234.

Northern Ireland

Lifeline helpline on 0808 808 8000, or search via the Public Health Agency.

Support for family and friends

Adfam is a UK charity that supports families and friends of people affected by alcohol or drug use. They provide confidential helplines, online resources, practitioner training and a searchable directory of local support groups specifically for relatives and carers. For more info visit adfam.org.uk or call 07442 137421 (note this is not a helpline but an enquiry line).

Al-Anon (al-anonuk.org.uk) offers meetings and a helpline for families and friends. Nacoa (nacoa.org.uk) provides a free helpline for children and young people affected by a parent's drinking.

Making a decision

There is no perfect moment to start and there is no single correct path. What matters most is that whatever you choose addresses your personal situation and drivers towards alcohol and supports you through stopping drinking and then extends beyond to work on long-term change.

If you are comparing providers, use the criteria in this guide to ask informed questions. A good provider will welcome that scrutiny.

A few things worth remembering

Ambivalence is normal; most people who change their relationship with alcohol did not feel "ready" when they started. Readiness often comes after the first step, not before it. You do not have to do this journey alone.

Reach out

Support is always available. If you'd like to explore whether our programme at Clean Slate Clinic is right for you, or simply want to talk through your situation and learn more about us then you can book a call with us.

There is no obligation, no pressure, we just want to support you whether that is with our programme, or helping you find another service that works for you.

Why Clean Slate Clinic exists

We built Clean Slate Clinic for the people who fall between the existing options, particularly those managing a career, a family and daily responsibilities.

NHS services offer valuable support, but demand can mean long waits and limited treatment. Residential rehab means weeks away from your life at considerable cost. Detox-only services address withdrawal, though the research is clear that detox without psychosocial aftercare does not work in the longer term.

Clean Slate sits between the two. Clinically rigorous, medically supervised and structured for the long term, delivered in your own home.
Clean Slate Clinic client and his dog

This is what Clean Slate looks like in practice

Doctor-led and CQC-registered

Clean Slate Clinic is registered directly with the Care Quality Commission (ID: 1-22152371205). Our clinical pathways are designed and overseen by addiction-specialist doctors and delivered by qualified clinicians. This is not a wellness programme with a medical veneer — it is a regulated clinical service, held to the same regulatory standards as hospitals and the NHS.

A 12-month programme, not a quick detox

Detox is a medical event of stopping alcohol. Recovery is a learning process. Our programme spans three phases over 12 months: assessment and preparation; medically supervised withdrawal with daily clinical reviews; and a recovery and maintenance phase with ongoing clinician appointments and access to SMART Recovery meetings. This reflects the evidence that lasting change requires sustained support.

Home-based by design

Behaviour change research shows that new coping strategies are most effective when they are learned in the environment where they will be used. Removing someone from their daily life can create a false sense of confidence that collapses on return. Our model is built around the opposite principle: supported change in real-world conditions.

Independently verified outcomes

Our treatment outcomes are evaluated by independent academic researchers and not self-reported. We believe that if a provider cannot show you verified data on how their clients do, that is worth noting.

A social enterprise, not a volume business

Clean Slate Clinic is a certified social enterprise (Social Enterprise UK, No. 17863). Our purpose is to make evidence-based addiction treatment more accessible. We exist to deliver good clinical outcomes, not to maximise patient throughput.

Suitability matters to us

We do not accept every referral. Our onboarding process includes a clinical suitability assessment and we will tell you directly if we believe another type of service would better meet your needs. The guide below exists because we mean that.

Who Clean Slate works well for

Our programme tends to be the best fit for people who are drinking at dependent levels, want to make a significant change, but need to continue managing their work, family and daily responsibilities during treatment.

Many of our clients are professionals who have been functioning outwardly while struggling privately; people who need a programme that takes both the clinical and the practical realities of their situation seriously.

If that describes your situation, you can take our confidential suitability assessment or book a call with the team to find out more.

Latest articles

Charlotte’s Story
Stories
August 2, 2026

Charlotte’s Story

When Charlotte saw her daughter had drawn her holding a wine glass, something shifted. After three years of knowing something was wrong, she finally reached out, got sober, and found her new normal.
Charlotte present with her family

The wine glass

It was the kind of drawing that usually ends up on the fridge. It had all the hallmarks of childhood: bright colours, stick figures, careful handwriting. But when Charlotte took a closer look at it, her heart dropped.

In the picture, she was holding a wine glass.

“I looked at it and thought, oh God. I’m passing this on to my kids,” she says. “They’re going to learn it from the get-go. And that, for me, was the bit that made it not okay anymore.”

It wasn’t the first time she’d questioned her drinking, but it was the first time she couldn’t look away.

This wasn’t just about her anymore, instead, it was about what was being normalised. About what her children might quietly absorb as ordinary.

And standing there with that card in her hands, she knew something had to change.

“I always knew”

Charlotte started drinking around fourteen. Boarding school culture made it feel inevitable as everyone drank, and heavily at that. What began as teenage experimentation slowly threaded itself into adulthood until alcohol wasn’t an event; it was simply a part of the day.

With the exception of her two pregnancies, when she stopped without much difficulty, she drank almost daily.

“I’ve never met a glass of wine that I didn’t finish,” she says. “I always knew it was probably something I didn’t have the control over that I really wanted to have.”

For years, that knowing hovered in the background. Around five years ago it became harder to ignore. She began negotiating with herself: spacing drinks with water, setting limits, promising tomorrow would be different. The familiar cycle of trying and failing chipped away at her confidence.

“I started to feel like it was owning me rather than just being something I did.”

If there wasn’t alcohol in the house, Charlotte would feel anxious - and she hated that something else had that much influence over her choices. Still, recognising the problem and acting on it were two very different things.

The help that didn’t land

Over the years, Charlotte raised her drinking with GPs - never explicitly saying the words “I have a problem.” She would circle around it, hoping someone would hear what she couldn’t quite say outright.

“The response was very much, ‘You’ll be right. Just cut down a bit.’”

Looking back, she sees those moments differently.

“I was calling for help. I just didn’t have the courage to say it clearly.”

No one dismissed her intentionally, but no one recognised the weight behind what she was hinting at either. And so the years continued. She knew something wasn’t right and she was unsure of what to do next.

Three years of knowing

Thinking back, Charlotte says it took about three years from fully recognising the issue to reaching out for support.

Three years of bargaining that slowly turned into quiet frustration, three years of feeling stuck and unable to make any progress.

“You almost feel paralysed,” she says. “You know you need help, but you don’t know how to ask for it properly.”

Each failed attempt at moderation reinforced the belief that she should be able to fix it herself. It was, in her words, “a pretty unpleasant time.”

Eventually she came across an online community that led her to a programme she could access from home. It didn’t feel institutional or overwhelming, rather it felt manageable.

She booked a call, then cancelled it.

“I was probably just scared.”

She booked again. And for reasons she still can’t fully explain, the day she made that second call she stopped drinking. Not as part of a grand plan, but because something in her had shifted.

By the time she had her first clinical appointment, she’d already been alcohol-free for nearly two weeks.

What struck her most wasn’t the structure of the programme, it was the fact that she was finally being heard.

“It was the first time I’d said it out loud and someone spoke back to me in a language I understood. It was remarkable.”

After years of minimising and half-admissions, someone responded without dismissal.

Responsibility with support

What mattered to Charlotte was that she remained in her own life while making changes.

“I liked that the responsibility was still mine, but I had support.”

She didn’t want to be removed from her world; she wanted to learn how to live in it differently. Regular check-ins gave rhythm to her weeks. Meetings that initially terrified her, slowly became grounding.

“I really struggled to go to the first few,” she admits. “Now I think they’re magic.”

The combination of structured support and shared experience helped her build tools she hadn’t known existed. Practical strategies, yes, but also a different way of seeing herself.

One of the biggest shifts for Charlotte was learning not to tie her worth to drinking, or to not drinking.

“It’s hard to stop measuring yourself against it,” she says. “But eventually it becomes just one part of your story, not the whole thing.”

Appointments created accountability, and knowing someone would ask how she was going added gentle momentum. Over time, the process felt less like crisis management and more like steady growth.

“It became a really nice rhythm.”

More space

When Charlotte describes her life now, she talks about space.

Her mornings began to feel spacious, with no headaches and no fog - and that sense of ease gradually extended into her mind.

“It’s really neat to wake up and just get on with the day.”

The anxiety that once hummed in the background has softened, and her life now feels more intentional rather than reactive.

“I don’t tolerate as much crap as I used to,” she says, smiling. “If something’s not good for me, I step away faster.”

The fear versus the reality

Before she stopped drinking, two fears loomed large. The first was around socialising and being the “different” person in the room - particularly in a culture where alcohol threads through celebration and grief alike, she worried about standing out.

The second was that life would be boring.

“I hadn’t really done anything fun without alcohol involved,” she says. “I thought alcohol equalled fun.”

However, neither fear materialised the way she expected.

“No one really questioned me,” she says. “If anything, people were curious.”

Some even began reflecting on their own drinking in those conversations. And as for fun?

“Fun is fun,” she says. “It doesn’t matter what you’re holding in your hand.”

These days, if a passing thought suggests a glass of wine, another voice answers quickly.

“Almost immediately I think, ‘Oh my God, no you wouldn’t.’”

As time passed, it felt less like deprivation and more like she had found her new normal.

The second card

Recently, her daughter found that original Mother’s Day card, the one with the wine glass.

“She said, ‘I need to draw that again without the wine glass. Because you don’t drink anymore.’”

Charlotte pauses when she tells this part.

The legacy she’d feared, the quiet message that a wine glass is how mum unwinds - has shifted. Not through perfection, but through action. Through doing something hard and staying with it.

Your discomfort is enough

If someone is wondering whether they should reach out, Charlotte’s advice is simple.

“Just do it.”

But more than that, she wishes someone had told her sooner that you don’t need to hit a dramatic rock bottom.

“If what you’re doing makes you uncomfortable, that’s enough,” she says. “You don’t need someone else to validate that.”

You don’t need to meet a stereotype. You don’t need to wait until things fall apart. If you wake up wishing you hadn’t done what you did the night before, or if a small voice keeps asking whether this is really how you want to live - that’s sufficient.

For Charlotte, acting on that discomfort changed the trajectory of her life.

“My goodness, my life is so much better without alcohol,” she says. “There’s nothing I miss about drinking. It just becomes normal not to. And I wouldn’t want to go back in a million years.”

There’ll be another card this Mother’s Day, and this time, Charlotte won’t be holding a wine glass.

Lauren's Story
July 20, 2026

Lauren's Story

Lauren could stop drinking but always relapsed around the 10-week mark. A later-in-life ADHD diagnosis explained the pattern, and 12 months of support helped her break it for good.
"Give me a paddock or a bushwalk and I don't care about much else." Lauren

The 10-week wall

Lauren could stop drinking, that wasn't the problem. She'd done it before, for years actually, and when things got difficult again, she could still manage periods without alcohol. But there was always a wall.

"I had managed to stop for periods, but 10 weeks seemed to be a tipping point," Lauren says. "I’d get to that point and before I knew it, I’d just be back doing it again."

She had tried everything: moderation strategies, measuring out drinks, self-education, therapy, naturopaths, diet changes, books, apps, podcasts and sober coaches. All the things.

Some of it helped, to a point, but nothing stuck long-term. "I just didn’t know why I couldn’t get past that point." And every time she hit that wall, the shame spiral would start all over again.

The second time around

Lauren had been alcohol-free for years. She'd done the work, found her footing, and moved forward. Then 2020 happened and Lauren went through a marriage breakdown, COVID and a move. So many things changed at once, and drinking slowly crept back in.

From the outside, Lauren was still functioning. She ran her own business working with horses, supporting people through equine therapy. She showed up for work, held it together, but inside she was falling apart.

"I felt myself becoming unhealthy. I just didn't seem to have the energy and drive that I wanted," she remembers. "And I was definitely isolating myself. It becomes a really private process."

The worst part was the disconnect between how she was supporting others, and how she couldn't seem to support herself.

"The work I do with my horses, supporting people - I don't want to be a fraud. I don't want to be doing this and then running in the door and having a drink. That just doesn't add up for me."

She knew there were other ways to be, to live and to take better care of herself. But knowing and doing felt like completely different things.

The illusion of “willpower”

Lauren kept setting goalposts. "I'm going to be 50 in three months. I'd really like to not be drinking at that point." Fifty came and went, and still nothing changed. Then New Year's, then another birthday - more goalposts she just couldn't meet.

"It puts so much pressure on you, and you’re really hard on yourself for not being able to do it. For not having the willpower, the strength - whatever. You say terrible things to yourself over that inability to change."

It wasn't from a lack of trying. Lauren was always searching, whether it be online, or through different books and programs - she’d constantly be looking for the answer, convinced it had to be out there somewhere.

The 12-month factor

When Lauren found Clean Slate online, a few things drew her in. First the privacy of being able to be at home, the ability to do the maths on what she was already spending versus what it would cost. And most importantly, the 12 months of ongoing support.

"That was the biggest thing for me, knowing that I would have someone for that long-term period. Because I knew three months was okay, but as soon as I went past that point, I was back in deep."

She signed up and soon after received a call from her nurse, Fiona.

Working with Fiona was different from the start - it was a softer approach with no big production. After the preparation phase, Fiona asked: "Have you thought about when you’d like to stop?" Lauren said no, not really. Fiona responded, "Let's just do it tomorrow then."

But it wasn't a straight line from there. Lauren dipped in and out, the pattern she'd always had, except when it happened this time, Fiona helped Lauren to reframe her experience.

"She just took the ‘bigness’ out of it. For once, it didn’t feel like a big deal. And that taught me, and my nervous system, not to panic about it."

Instead, Fiona helped Lauren notice patterns. "How does that feel? What was going on?", she’d say. Constantly assessing that process and what may have been happening. Every check-in, Lauren had something to explore: a course, a book or someone to read about. There was always something to investigate.

"Being curious about the what’s and the why’s is a big part of recovery."

The missing piece

Through their conversations, Fiona had been noticing things - patterns in how Lauren talked about being overwhelmed, about anxiety and the way she approached her work and her life.

"It was almost like sabotage, but it wasn't on purpose."

And then Fiona asked: "Have you ever looked at having a mental health diagnosis? What about ADHD as a possibility?"

Lauren knew there was research around later-in-life diagnoses for women, and she knew that women were often overlooked as children - but she'd never connected it to herself.

"I did some reading, checked it out, and was quite shocked at how my whole life had potentially been affected by this without me knowing. It gave an explanation to so many things."

She found a psychologist, got diagnosed, and started medication. "That was probably the biggest game changer for me."

Because suddenly, the pattern made sense. The 10-week wall made sense. The way she'd been trying to regulate herself through alcohol - it all made sense. She'd been self-medicating without even knowing it.

"As soon as I went through that process and got the diagnosis, alcohol just became irrelevant." It was the final piece of the puzzle.

Care of self, not self-care

The ADHD diagnosis opened the door to understanding so many other things affecting Lauren's wellbeing. Perimenopause was hitting hard, she had been dealing with bouts of sleeplessness, hot flushes at night, extremely low iron levels that were almost debilitating, things she'd just been trying to push through.

"You think you’re okay, even as things are getting worse. But actually stopping to do that ‘care of self’ stuff - that’s something else entirely."

She makes a distinction: not "self-care" in the luxury sense, but "care of self". The foundational things your body actually needs like food, water, supplements - the basics.

"When you're drinking, you rely on the sugars in what you're drinking to support you through the day. You don't worry so much about food. But when you stop drinking, there's that really well-rounded support system that you have to put in place for yourself. And you have to notice when things aren't quite right."

Movement and mindfulness became important too: just walking down the bike track with the dogs, and being present with the animals she works with.

"Whatever they're doing, you’re with them and you’re watching them. You’re not thinking about other things."

And she became protective of her energy and her space. "I'm very careful about who I share my time with now, because that's all part of what keeps me healthy and on track."

What's different now

When Lauren talks about how her life has changed, the list is comprehensive. "There’s more time in every day. More things get done. There's this new-found strength and confidence in my ability to set my mind on things and be able to do them."

For years, Lauren had beaten herself up, telling herself she was weak because she couldn't stop drinking. Now she sees her own strength clearly.

"There’s more clarity, more drive and direction. I can make good, clear decisions quite easily. There's a sense of freedom where you can just pick up and do anything at any time. You don't have to think about, 'Can I drive my car? Can I do this?'. There's nothing holding you back."

The physical transformation has been significant. Lauren had been watching herself put on weight week after week, feeling like this was just how things were going to be now. Now she's gone from "I just keep going in this direction" back to physically feeling like herself again.

But perhaps most striking is the transformation in her work. Lauren runs programs for women, working with horses to support people through difficult experiences.

"The difference in my ability to do my work has been chalk and cheese." Focus and procrastination were things that she'd struggled with her whole life - but now, they were beginning to feel easier.

"I haven't mastered it yet, but I've definitely improved a great deal."

And through all of this - the ADHD diagnosis, the perimenopause support, the foundational care and the boundary-setting - Lauren has arrived at something profound: "I feel more myself than probably I ever have."

Finding awe

Whilst on the journey of consuming endless amounts of content, there was one idea that stuck with Lauren. It was from Julie Goodwin’s book, who was a past MasterChef winner that’s been open about her own journey with mental health and alcohol - and the idea was simple: awe is the answer.

"Being in awe of something - nature, birds, whatever completely enthrals you and takes you somewhere else. That’s a big help."

For Lauren, that's often found outdoors. Taking in light, beauty, nature, trees, birds, the sky, and being surrounded by animals who require her full presence. "That’s become my thing."

Sometimes she needs a change of scenery, but mostly, she's found her rhythm in the life she's built, surrounded by horses, dogs and the natural world. "Give me a paddock or a bushwalk and I don't care about much else."

It's about everything else

When Lauren thinks about what she'd tell someone considering reaching out for help, she comes back to one thing. "Just do it. What have you got to lose? The all-around support, the learning about yourself that you do in the process - it doesn't even become about the alcohol. It's about everything else."

For Lauren, "everything else" was discovering she had ADHD, understanding why her nervous system worked the way it did, and recognising the perimenopause symptoms that were making everything harder. And finally, learning about foundational care, not as a luxury, but as a necessity.

"We grow up and we don't learn that stuff. We don't learn nervous system regulation and awareness. So we seek it in other places."

For her, that other place had been alcohol, but it was never really about the alcohol itself. It was about trying to regulate a nervous system that worked differently than she'd understood. Trying to function through perimenopause without support, and trying to manage overwhelm without the right tools.

Once she understood those underlying pieces - the ADHD diagnosis, the medication, the awareness of what her body actually needed - the 10-week wall disappeared. Not because she suddenly had more willpower, but because she finally understood what was actually going on.

"It's a very soft, gentle process of relearning how to regulate - how to be okay."

Walking, being active, being surrounded by animals who ground her, taking in beauty and nature, and choosing carefully what gets her time and attention. These aren't strategies to avoid drinking. They're ways of building a life that actually works for who Lauren is, a life where alcohol becomes irrelevant because she's found better ways to take care of herself.

And on the other side? She's more herself than she's ever been.

Lauren with one of the horses she works alongside, supporting others through equine therapy.

If this story brings up difficult feelings for you, or if you or someone you know is struggling, support is available. Please contact Samaritans on 116 123 (24/7) or visit samaritans.org.

Greer's Story
July 20, 2026

Greer's Story

A healthcare worker who self-medicated for trauma, Greer believed she needed alcohol to cope. She shares how ‘progress, not perfection’ helped her find joy again.

‘Greer’ is a pseudonym and has chosen to share her story anonymously to protect her privacy. Everything in her account is real and personal, including the images. Only her name has been changed.

The new hobby that filled the space alcohol left behind. Greer has chosen to tell her story anonymously, and has shared these beautiful images.

"She celebrated progress, not perfection"

If you ask Greer what made the biggest difference in her journey, she won't hesitate.

"Progress, not perfection. That was probably the biggest thing that helped me give up, I reckon."

In many traditional programs, one mistake means starting again from the beginning. It can feel like failure. This way of thinking often leads to shame and discouragement, which makes change harder instead of easier.

But her nurse offered a different lens: If you slip up twice in 100 days, you're 98% successful.

"It wasn't about perfection," Greer explains. "It meant that okay, I've messed up, but tomorrow's another day. Even though I drank part-way through my programme, I'm still 98% succeeding. It didn't make me feel defeated and think, 'Oh, I may as well not bother. It's too hard because I have to keep going back to day zero.'"

This reframe changed everything. It meant Greer could be honest when she slipped - no lying, no hiding, no shame.

"I didn't feel like I would disappoint my nurse. I could tell her the truth about when and how and why."

Being able to be honest, feel safe, and have small successes recognised helped Greer make long-term change - and sixteen months into her journey, she's living proof that it works.

The gutless robber

Greer speaks honestly and clearly about how alcohol affected her life.

"It's a gutless robber," she says. "It steals from every aspect of your life - physical, mental, emotional, your energy, confidence, work, hobbies - all of it. And it does it in a sneaky way, without you realising the impact."

For many years, Greer believed she needed alcohol to cope. While working as a nurse and living with trauma, ongoing health problems, and severe sleep difficulties, it often felt like the only thing that helped.

It relaxed her muscles when the pain flared. It quieted the nightmares, at least temporarily. It gave her a brief escape from ongoing stress.

"I was using it to numb my feelings," Greer explains. "To help regulate my nervous system. But also, for my pain - alcohol relaxed my muscles. I found it was even more effective than prescription pain relief."

At the time, Greer did not realise she was also trying to manage undiagnosed neurodivergence. She was later assessed for ADHD and autism after joining the programme, which helped her better understand her experiences.

"The whole neurodivergent role that my life has played, the part that addiction to alcohol played in trying to self-medicate, trying to regulate my nervous system, satisfy that dopamine-seeking behaviour - it all made sense," she reflects.

Looking back now, sixteen months into her journey, she sees it all differently.

"I thought I wouldn't have any joy without it. I thought I wouldn't be able to cope. But it's actually better without it. You get so much more back than alcohol ever gave you."

When coping became dependence

Greer’s relationship with alcohol was relatively healthy for most of her adult life. Social drinking, nothing excessive, nothing that raised red flags.

"I started drinking to cope," she says simply. "And it was gradual. It just got more and more."

She wasn't drinking in the mornings. She wasn't drinking every single day. She wasn't what most people picture when they think of addiction.

But the role alcohol was playing in her life was undeniable - and unsustainable.

“You’re not drinking enough”

When Greer decided to seek support, she hit an unexpected wall.

She reached out to a local health service for help with her drinking. But the service she contacted was a detox-only programme - and because Greer wasn't experiencing significant withdrawal symptoms, they weren't able to support her.

"The local agency wasn't able to support my withdrawal because it was only a medically supported detox programme, not detox and rehab," Greer explains. "Basically, I didn’t require the medication as I wasn't drinking enough to give me the withdrawal symptoms, and there was nothing else they could offer me, as that was the basis of their service."

This highlights an important reality: alcohol dependence can look very different for different people and take many forms. The main issue isn't necessarily the quantity you drink - it's whether you have a healthy relationship with it.

Because Greer's drinking didn't align with the clinical markers that made her "severe enough" to qualify for that particular service, it became harder to find the right support.

She knew alcohol was becoming a problem. Why did she have to wait until it got worse?

Then there was the other issue: privacy.

As a nurse in a small community, Greer knew she would be easily recognised in in-person support groups.

"I wanted to protect my privacy," she explains. "Having this lived experience definitely helps me understand and have empathy for my patients - but they don't need to know."

Through a different local health service, she heard about Clean Slate. The telehealth model meant confidentiality. The programme was evidence-based and structured. And when her health insurer didn't initially cover it, the Clean Slate team worked with her to make it happen.

"I'm really grateful they came on board," she says.

"We've got you"

From her very first appointment, Greer felt something she hadn't felt in a long time.

Safety.

"There was this sense of 'we've got you, we believe in you, you can make it,'" she recalls. "Even though I didn't believe in myself, having people I respected hold that space for me was crucial."

She'd lost her ability to have faith in herself. The trauma, the pain, the exhaustion - it had all worn her down to the point where she couldn't see a way forward.

"I really needed someone to have that faith for me and hold that space."

Her nurse made all the difference. Empathetic but professional. Knowledgeable but not clinical. And most importantly - authentic.

"It wasn't textbook," Greer explains. "It didn't feel like she was just applying some protocol. I felt matched with someone I really connected with, someone so easy to talk to."

Her nurse spoke to her on equal footing. Never made her feel inferior or ashamed. Instead, she empowered her.

"She enabled me to feel like it was possible to still respect myself. That I didn't have anything to be ashamed of."

And the support was holistic. Their conversations weren't limited to alcohol. If Greer was struggling with her mental health, her chronic pain, a difficult situation at work - her nurse was willing to discuss it all.

"She helped me break things down, did cost-benefit analyses on different issues," Greer says. "She could see holistically that addressing whatever was concerning me was smart and wise, even if it wasn't directly about drinking."

The SMART meetings also became very important to her. At first, they gave her structure and support, helping her stay on track. Over time, they also helped her see her situation more clearly.

"There were several healthcare workers in my group," she remembers. "Lots of people from different contexts. It gave me an understanding of how many different people are affected by this. The problem's greater than just my own."

Seeing that she wasn't alone, that addiction didn't discriminate, made her less hard on herself.

What's different now

Greer is now sixteen months into her journey, and when she talks about what's changed, the list is long.

Her relationships are stronger now. When she was drinking, people close to her noticed changes in her behaviour, such as becoming more irritable or the occasional comment she wouldn't even remember saying. It created distance between her and the people she was closest to.

"I was normally a very gentle person, but when I drank too much, it would make me kind of irritable and a bit negative. People honestly didn't think I would even notice I was being like that."

Now? The people in her life tell her how proud they are and feel closer to her than ever.

The mental fog has lifted. "I felt like a brain fog had lifted," Greer says. "I could retain things in my mind better. My working memory before was really rusty and fuzzy. I couldn't hold things in my brain."

She now has more energy. When she was drinking, it left her feeling tired and worn out. Without alcohol, she feels stronger, more focused, and more present in daily life.

Without alcohol, she's had to find new ways to manage her chronic pain - something she's still working through. But that work, she says, feels more honest than numbing it. The nightmares she had for years are now much less severe.

Greer was deliberate about filling the space alcohol had left. She sought out psychological support, leant into exercise and breathwork, and explored alternative approaches to managing her chronic pain. Replacing the coping mechanism, she found, was just as important as removing it.

And perhaps most important: she found joy again.

"I had lost the ability to find joy and the ability to think I would ever feel it again," she reflects. "Now there's hope, excitement, prospects. I've got new hobbies, I started knitting!"

Near the end of the programme, Greer tried a glass of red wine, the flavour profile she'd once loved most. The one she'd spent years developing an appreciation for.

It tasted like poison.

"Why did I ever think this was nice?" she wondered, genuinely baffled. "Why did I spend so much time acquiring a taste for poison? There's no logic in that. It sounds insane to me now."

Her view of alcohol has completely changed. She now notices how common it is in everyday life, in media and social settings. She also sees how much mental effort it once took to think about drinking, including when, what, and how much to drink.

"It removes all that," she says. "I have decision fatigue as it is. I'm so much better off without it. I almost feel lucky. I don't have to stress about it anymore."

You have to do it, to feel it

When asked what she'd tell someone who's scared of what life might look like without alcohol, Greer’s answer is characteristically direct.

"You don't realise the impact until you stop. You have to do it to feel it."

Before she quit, she thought she needed alcohol. Believed it was helping her cope with trauma, with pain, with stress, with everything. Those were the stories she told herself.

"But I can tell you: you get your life back in every aspect. You just get so much more back than alcohol ever gave you."

For Greer, accepting that she had a problem with alcohol was the hardest step - admitting it to herself, not just to others.

"Denial can be so strong," she reflects. "I felt like I was clinging so tightly to the denial like it was life and death. For me it was because of the judgements I unconsciously placed on myself - the shame of being weak, of being controlled by a substance."

But once she took a leap of courage - not wanting things to get worse, recognising the progression of dependency and tolerance, noticing how she was starting to think about drinking all the time - and acknowledged she had a drinking problem, the hardest part was over.

"Then I could start challenging my shame," she says. "And with my nurse's help and that of the group, I realised there are many factors in our biochemistry, neurotype, trauma, mental health, upbringing - so many things that can predispose us to falling into this unhealthy coping mechanism trap. And then there is the fact that drinking is so highly ingrained in our culture."

She wants people to know, especially healthcare workers who might be reading this, wondering if it's okay to seek help - that alcohol dependence doesn't look the same for everyone. You don't have to be drinking specific quantities or experiencing severe withdrawal to have a problem worthy of support.

You don't have to wait until you're "bad enough." If alcohol is playing a role in your life that concerns you, that's enough.

"Trust the process," she advises. "Surround yourself with positive people. Remember: progress, not perfection."

If you're worried about how you will fill your time or keep your mind busy without alcohol?

"Ask yourself: if you could do anything, what would you want to do? For me, it was learning to knit. Find something that gives you satisfaction, keeps your hands busy, replaces that habit with something meaningful."

She pauses, then adds something that surprises even her:

"And know that it won't feel like a sacrifice. It'll feel like freedom."

Today, Greer is thriving. More present in her relationships. More capable at work. More hopeful about the future. The gutless robber no longer has a hold on her.

"I thought I needed alcohol to cope," she reflects. "But what I've learned is that I cope so much better without it. Life is genuinely better on this side."

The new hobby that filled the space alcohol left behind. Greer has chosen to tell her story anonymously, and has shared these beautiful images.

If this story brings up difficult feelings for you, or if you or someone you know is struggling, support is available. Please contact Samaritans on 116 123 (24/7) or visit samaritans.org.